Bumper Stickers

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.

Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.

Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular? 

Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

It was recently discovered that research causes cancer in rats.

If you don't like my driving - STAY OFF THE SIDEWALK!

HONK if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.

Did you check if your horn works?

If I'm So Slow, How come I'm Ahead of You?

Cover me, I'm changing lanes.

If you can read this, I can hit my brakes and sue you.

I'm not driving fast, just flying low.

I hear you lost your cat? Check under my tire.

I spent my tax refund on this bumper sticker

Amish bumper sticker: Caution! Do not step in exhaust.

Honk if you hate bumper stickers that say "Honk if ..."

Drive defensively -- buy a tank.

If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now.

Forget world peace. Visualize using your turn signal.

Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them.

I love animals - they're delicious.

If we aren't supposed to eat animals why are they made of meat?

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather - Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

As a matter of fact, I do own the road!

If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over
[Seen Upside Down, On A Jeep]

I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person

Illiterate? Write For Help

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

Gravity- It's not just a good idea, it's the LAW!

Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!

I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.

Support bacteria! It's the only culture some people have.

If God intended man to smoke, He would have set him on fire.

They told me I was gullible... and I believed them.

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.

If you don't like the news, go out and make some.