- You answer the door before people knock.
- Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
- You ski uphill.
- You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
- You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
- You lick your coffeepot clean.
- Your eyes stay open when you sneeze.
- You chew on other people's fingernails.
- Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
- You can type 60 words per minute ... with your feet.
- You can jump-start your car without cables.
- All your kids are named "Joe."
- You don't need a hammer to pound nails
- You don't sweat, you percolate.
- You buy half & half by the barrel.
- You’ve worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
- You forget to unwrap candy bars before eating them.
- You’ve built a miniature city out of little plastic stirrers.
- People get dizzy just watching you.
- You’ve worn the finish off your coffee table.
- Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
- Your taste buds are so numb you could drink your lava lamp.
- Instant coffee takes too long.
- Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
- You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
- You short out motion detectors.
- You don't even wait for the water to boil anymore.
- Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
- You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.
- You don't tan, you roast.
- You can't even remember your second cup.
- You help your dog chase its tail.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Too Much Coffee
I don't drink coffee because I don't like the taste and I've never needed it as a pick-me-up. It does bad things to your body and may cause you to behave erratically. If you love your coffee, here are some signs you've had too much:
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